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May 26, 2011

Here I Go Again


So I am back again. I opened up blogger with a new zest, all prepared to write down what I have planned for myself to help me lose weight. It then dawned on me. I have spent almost all of my adult (and teen) life obsessed with my weight.

I have never been happy with how I look, even when I did look good. I know that almost all of my weight problems are born from my emotional and mental being. I have always been an emotional eater and as I have aged, I (mentally) believe there is no hope for me as I have damaged myself through yo-yo dieting.

I took a long hard look in the mirror today and feel blah! After 4 kids my body has become an indescribable shape, my skin is sagging (everywhere) and I have aged at least 20 years in the face. I had let myself go, so badly in fact that I do not recognise myself anymore. The zest that I once had has fizzled and the smile that reached from ear to ear is now down turned. I look old, I feel old.

Having said this, I do love who I am as a person. I have many fantastic qualities but my outer exterior is my biggest challenge, along with the emotional roller coaster that I continually throw myself on.

I am now challenging myself to work on my mind, body and spirit. To take better care of myself and regain back some of that amazing zest for life. Today is the first day of the rest of my life!

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